For whom it may concern.......

There is just something I need to get out of my system. I usually write when I feel down, but this is different. I want, I need someone to read it, and I felt this was the perfect place to say, since you guys know me without any mask, I don't hide my true self here, and it's such a relieve.

Have you ever had any big insignificant regret? I mean, a regret that for some people may be insignificant, but to you is your biggest one? Well, this last few days have been hell for me.

I suppose I should start by the beggining. It all started around 7th grade or so. I've always been kinda shy, and then I met this girl. I instantly had a crush on her. Of course, I had zero experience with girls, and got nervous around new people. But with her, it was different. She's the only person I've ever opened like that. She became my best friend. We talked all day, we were always with each other, laughing, talking. I fell in love with her. I've never felt something like I felt for her. She was smart, funny, beatiful, and most important, I felt great around her. But then, like my life usually goes, I made something stupid.

One day we were talking, she was teasing me, telling me that another girl had a crush on me. After I told her that I didn't liked the other girl, we walked for a few second and she stopped. She looked me in the eyes and asked me if there was someone I liked. I, stupid as always, chickend out. I told her that I didn't liked no one in particular. I smiled and kept walking. I probably blushed and I didn't wanted to see her face. I wanted to hit myself so hard I would lose conciousness. Next week, she told me she got a boyfriend and that she was leaving the school(her family was moving out or something).

Man, I was crushed. And when she left, we just, lost contact. I don't really know why, but it just happened. A couple years later, we started talking again(god bless facebook). But everything had changed. It wasn't the same anymore. I don't know what went wrong, I really don't, but we started fighting. I haven't spoken to her in half a year.

Now I look back, and see that I changed. After the first time she left, I felt miserable. I felt like a coward. I was a coward. It was then that I decided that after that great regret, as long as I didn't hurt anyone, I would live my life however the fuck I wanted, without giving a single fuck what other people thought. So far, I've kept that. But alcohol has that little wonder of reminding you things best left forgotten. Even though I feel like I changed for better after that, I wish I could go back in time and answer different. I don't know what could had happened. Maybe she didn't felt the same, maybe it wouldn't had worked. But that maybe is killing me. I want, I need to know what could had happened. Now it kills me that I'll never know. Funny how things work out.

And well, that's all. I just really needed to get that off my system. Whoever read that whole wall of text, thank you. At least I know someone read it.

While it doesn't concern me... I did read it. >.>

Scott Chain wrote:

While it doesn't concern me... I did read it. >.>

I really couldn't think of any other title <.<

Malcolm Malorne wrote:

Scott Chain wrote:

While it doesn't concern me... I did read it. >.>

I really couldn't think of any other title <.<

lol

*pats Malcolm's back*

You have a long life ahead of you son... ^_^

Scott Chain wrote:

Malcolm Malorne wrote:

Scott Chain wrote:

While it doesn't concern me... I did read it. >.>

I really couldn't think of any other title <.<

lol

*pats Malcolm's back*

You have a long life ahead of you son... ^_^

My good friend, you are not old enough to speak to me with that tone

Can't get into contact with her on facebook anymore?

Valkus Werdana wrote:

Can't get into contact with her on facebook anymore?

We fought. Really bad.

Things i regret.

- Doing speed, getting addicted to it.
- Nearly killing a guy, i was drunk and i was pissed. He tried to lure me into a fight but i just went wailing on the poor guy untill his face was completely smashed.
- Stealing candy from a store once as a child.
- Not being able to find that one girl.
- I regret only having sex with sluts without any redeeming characteristics except for having big boobs. And call them my girlfriend for 3 weeks. And then dumping the cumdumpster for what she is.
- Being a total drunk, and being dependant on alcohol to make my spare time bareable.
- Not picking up my guitar again for years. Who knows what kind of sick skills i could have had if i went on when iw as 14.

But things to regret are in the past, so i don't keep myself busy with them. Things i am GOING to regret.

- Thinking i have found that one girl, knock her up and find out slowly that i hate her. <- ends in divorce but most likely in dif trashbags.
- Having a child.
- Not getting that cunt an abortion.
- Getting addicted to drugs again.
- Having aids from that tramp/my wife.
- Wife grows fat with sacky tits and she is horny all the time. And i want to hang myself.
- Setting up an insurance for something. But because the insurance comp went broke they won't pay out.
- Hanging myself when this happens. Regretting i didn't do it sooner.
- My son/daughter becomes a teen star like Hannah Montana or Justin Bieber.
- Being known for killing disney corps latest money milk machine.
- After what that slut called my wife did to me i regret not being gay.

Malcolm Malorne wrote:

Valkus Werdana wrote:

Can't get into contact with her on facebook anymore?

We fought. Really bad.

With women... you will be surprised how "i'm sorry" will turn things around.. Even if you are not in the wrong, those two words will do wonders.

Malcolm Malorne wrote:

Scott Chain wrote:

Malcolm Malorne wrote:

Scott Chain wrote:

While it doesn't concern me... I did read it. >.>

I really couldn't think of any other title <.<

lol

*pats Malcolm's back*

You have a long life ahead of you son... ^_^

My good friend, you are not old enough to speak to me with that tone

Oh I think I am... because I can easily say it to myself. ^_^

My biggest regret:

I was ten years old and I lost my front tooth on a trampoline. Just about 6 years later, and I still have braces to hold the fake tooth in place.

Things I'm going to regret:

Not doing my big chem lab report...

My regrets:

Opening myself up to someone who in the end evidently didn't care for me as much as I did for them.

Opening myself up to the same person again after they basically ditched me the first time, to the same end result as the first fling.

(Short story: Don't bother with long distance relationships.)

-------------
I regret not making moves with the female friends I had that are evident to me in hindsight.

(Prime example: When a friend takes your keys, and drops them down into her panties...*You do not do that gentleman shit any longer. You jam your hand down her pants.)

I regret not drawing more, when I have plenty of time to do it.

I regret even making some of these things regrets, because in the end I know I'm better prepared (read: Jaded) for the future.