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 RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.

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Vigo Surai
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PostSubject: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 3:41 am

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(8 years of a sore throat for a single cup to soothe. Pff.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)


The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(HOLLYWOOD TOLD THE TRUTH.)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
(Huh. 'Magine that. I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Get fit, and braindead! Join Jersey shore!)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home . What the...?)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity.)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm.......)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing.)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?!)

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The Laughing Man
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 10:23 am

Why would you want to be a pig? You eat garbage, you're fucking ugly, and, more than likely, you'll meet your fate at the hands of a butcher.

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Scott Chain
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 12:39 pm

Vigo Surai wrote:
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(8 years of a sore throat for a single cup to soothe. Pff.)
So what yer sayin is that you don't burn off many calories yelling...

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)
New idea for terrorists...


The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(HOLLYWOOD TOLD THE TRUTH.)
When they were talking blood sport... this is what they meant.

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)
So to choose between 30 orgasms... and bacon... tough choice.

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
(Huh. 'Magine that. I'm still not over the pig.)
I've seen chickens last longer...

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Get fit, and braindead! Join Jersey shore!)
That would explain why all their heads look flat...

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home . What the...?)
Now that's just cruel...

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)
Fleas also burn the equivalent of 350 times their body when you fry em...

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)
What a waste...

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity.)
It's good to be the king...

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)
I thought that was with their antenna? The fucks their antenna for?

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm.......)
I've heard stories of tongues being ripped from the body... so apparently not.

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
If you're right footed you have 9 more in... oh wai... >.>

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing.)
I'd love to see a turtle jump...

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.)
>.> *grabs black light*

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)
They also think it's night when you put a sock over their head... and they taste great.

Starfish have no brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)
That would explain the NO REMORSE!

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer.)
Polar bears also drink Coka-Colla... and are commonly used as the Canadian Taxi.

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?!)
Then wtf is up with rabbits and mice?


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Malcolm
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 6:15 pm

- You lose IQ everytime you enter /b/
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Scott Chain
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 6:47 pm

Malcolm Malorne wrote:
- You lose IQ everytime you go online...

fixtdatdurferja...

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The Laughing Man
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 8:53 pm

I'll just leave this here...



A spider...in a woman's ear, just read it in an article.

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Vigo Surai
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 10:29 pm

It's coming out to say hello to the nice shiny camera lens.
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Scott Chain
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Thu Aug 09, 2012 10:38 pm

SURPRISE! We're renovating... free of charge!

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The Laughing Man
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Fri Aug 10, 2012 3:08 pm

The question is: Would you fuck that spider in the ass?

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Vigo Surai
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:16 pm

The Laughing Man wrote:
The question is: Would you fuck that spider in the ass?

It seems to be a healthy, clean-living spider. Minus the earwax of course.

-gets lubed up-
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King Clovis
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:41 pm

Vigo Surai wrote:
The Laughing Man wrote:
The question is: Would you fuck that spider in the ass?

It seems to be a healthy, clean-living spider. Minus the earwax of course.

-gets lubed up-

Eh....

Your post is missing something...



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Last edited by Brucil on Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:15 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Fuckin' broken links...)
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Vigo Surai
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:07 pm

Brucil wrote:
Vigo Surai wrote:
The Laughing Man wrote:
The question is: Would you fuck that spider in the ass?

It seems to be a healthy, clean-living spider. Minus the earwax of course.

-gets lubed up-

Eh....

Your post is missing something...




Y'don't say?
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A-Train
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:25 am

Spider? In her ear?


eweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweweeweweweweewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewewew
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The Laughing Man
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Sun Aug 12, 2012 9:45 am

I found you Vigo (and Scott's watching)


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TitanT2
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Sun Aug 12, 2012 5:20 pm

The Laughing Man wrote:
I found you Vigo (and Scott's watching)


i found a picture of myself... Bask in my greatness

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Vigo Surai
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Sun Aug 12, 2012 9:03 pm

The Laughing Man wrote:
I found you Vigo (and Scott's watching)


it was a very squirrely night. I couldn't control myself.
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King Clovis
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PostSubject: Re: RANDOM FACTS O'LIFE. and such.   Sun Aug 12, 2012 11:42 pm

TitanT2 wrote:
The Laughing Man wrote:
I found you Vigo (and Scott's watching)


i found a picture of myself... Bask in my greatness


My response to both of these:

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